Light A Candle

Light a candle on the day you celebrate Christmas in memory of your child. Keep it lit throughout the day. This is a very special and subtle way to remember your child. It is also a wonderful way to relax, personally, on a very stressful and sometimes very sad day.

Become a Peer Parent

A wonderful way to not only memorialize your child, but help other grieving parents is to become a peer parent. Contact your local hospitals, clinics, and Department of Public Heath. Explain your personal story to them. Tell they you would like your name and number given to doctors, nurses, social workers, etc. and would like to be contacted if you can help in any way. A Friend says; "When my son died, I felt terribly alone. Not only are you helping someone, but also your child is having a positive impact on someone."

Traditions

The birthdays, or estimated date of birth, will generally be a difficult day. Especially the first since the death of your child. You can set special traditions to remember your child. The traditions allow you to celebrate your child and keep a very special role in you and your family's lives.

Framed Photo

If you have a special photo or sonogram print out, get it specially framed and display it in a special area of your home. A Friend says: "For me, it symbolized my son watching over our home. I also had a very special Native American verse placed in the frame. It is the verse that helped me the most during my grief".

Special Garden or Tree

One memorial to a loved one is to plant a flowering tree; place a white fence around it and build a cross inside the fence with the full name on the cross. This can be a very beautiful tribute.

Buy a Memorial Light

Many hospitals have memorial trees during the holiday season. These are trees made of a metal frame and the “tree” appears in lights. Buy a light in memory of your child at Christmas time. Most funds go to a charity or to improvements at the medical facility.

Small Birthday Party with Family

It may seem odd to people who have not suffered the loss of a child to continue on remembering the child's birthday. If you and your immediate family feel comfortable with it, have a small birthday “party” with supper. Get your family together, have a special dinner and birthday cake with ice cream for dessert.

Birthday Figurines

A way to memorialize your child year after year is find figurines and collectibles with the numbers of their age and place them in a special spot. If you cannot find figurines, craft stores sell figurines you can paint yourself.

Donate a Toy to a Needy Child

Most towns and cities have programs for Christmas time like the Toys for Tots program for needy children. A Friend says: "Every year, I find a boy that is Zachary's age and purchase a gift in memory of Zachary. It makes me feel great. Not only am I remembering my son in a very thoughtful way, I am also helping to make a child's Christmas brighter."

Buy A Newborn or New Mom A Gift

Another tradition you can set is giving a new mother or newborn baby a gift. A Friend says, "On Zachary's birthday, I call our local hospital to see if any baby's were born. If there were, I send flowers or a baby gift basket. If there were more than one baby born, I send it to the first baby born but send cards to all the other families. If no babies were born that day, I wait until the first one after the day is born and send it to them."