Welcome to Funeral Tips

Be Reassuring

Be reassuring to the parents and or family. Often times, parents / spouse may have guilt over what happened. They feel that it is their fault in some way. A Friend said: "I know I blamed myself for my son's death for a very long time. If only I had been in the back and my mother had been driving. If only we hadn't driven so far." If only...... Reassure the parents or family that what happened is not their fault and that they didn't cause this to happen, should they hint toward these thoughts.

Don´t Avoid

If you are the friend of someone who lost a loved one, don't wait to say the “right” thing. There is no “right” thing to say. Telling your friend “I'm sorry”, or “you are in my thoughts”, are comforting to the bereaved; you´ll let them know your intentions are in the right place. The worst feeling can be when people you care about can't talk to you because they didn't know what to say.

Be There

Sometimes the best thing you can do is being there. Be there to listen to them. Be there to offer a hand to hold. Offer your support, friendship, and help. Sometimes, a little help around the home or office goes a long way and is very well appreciated.

Send A Card

Remember the parent with a special card or phone call on the birthday of the child and the one-year anniversary. Let the parent know that you are aware of what day it is and that your warmest thoughts are with them. Or invite them out for the day and help them busy themselves.

Be Encouraging

Encourage the parents to talk honestly with you about what they are feeling. Assure them that they can talk openly and freely about their feelings, but don't push them to talk about them. When you offer to be there for them, sooner or later the parent will come to you. Also encourage them to be honest with you about what kind of help they need and what they want done.

Respect Their Decisions

One challenge that faces a ´survivor´ is the pressure from friends and family about what should or should not be done. Allow the parent/spouse/child room to make the decisions they feel right, and that are right for them. Although you may not agree or disagree with the decisions made, support and respect them. Remember that the decisions are THEIRS to make and not others.